Releaser Needed

Right now. This very minute. I’m at work. I have long list of things that MUST be done today, and all I can think about is getting off. And I don’t mean at 5. It’s like the more stress I have the more I need the release. You could judge the deadline pressure by the wetness of my panties. And for some stupid reason I’m using three minutes to type this rather than reach up my skirt and fix things.

What I need is someone under my desk, taking care of things for me… because I really need both hands to get my work done.

Can you see that job posting? Wanted: Man with good hands and mouth. Must be able to fit in cramped spaces, work odd hours and be available at a moments notice. Should be able to spend an excessive amount of time on his knees.

What other abilities could we add to this “job description”?

27 thoughts on “Releaser Needed

  1. Heh, at the risk of sounding a little sexist, I’m always telling my wife she is my stress relief. With my career quickly sliding down the tubes, she has been “relieving” alot of stress lately.

  2. I think any man would love to fill that job description for you. Or maybe its just me? ;)

    Seriously i have the same problem so to speak. Is there room for an add for a woman? lol

  3. Love this post! Heres an additional skill needed:

    Initial ability to learn code quickly, ( similar to morse code) and work independently to reach goals with high probability of sudden distractions.

  4. I know what you mean. Haven’t had “stress relief” for over three weeks. And never really had it from a partner either:O But hey, you know this, why am I telling you again? Hm…. I need a drink

  5. I want one!! I’m worried I’d never get work done because I’d be on my back more than he’d be on his knees. I’m too much of a giver too so I’d wanna return the favor often. A girl can dream though. I can certainly dream. :)

    • Or is it? Those lacking a Y chromosome are usually much harder to read. Who knows what devious plots one could conceal. It’s a bit of a double-edged sword. But I’d be willing to give a girl a try. For president, that is. :)

  6. Pingback: Weekend Wonderings – August 12th | Creative Noodling

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