I’m a little embarrassed. For the past few days anyone visiting my blog for the first time was greeted with a rather graphic account of how I spent Saturday morning. I was raised better. I promise. In the spirit of not “spreading it all out there” as I did in my previous post, it’s time to add some much needed class to this blog with a few words of wisdom to myself on how to act (act being the key word) like a lady.
First, don’t succumb to the cheap thrill of watching your stats climb every time your posts detail real or imagined sexcapades. I enjoy reading the quiver inducing erotic post as much as the next guy or gal and will continue to post sassy, somewhat sexy stuff… but not just for a number jump. Well. I will try. Very, very hard. I’ve actually read about some very hard things lately… but I digress.
Second, don’t pout that you will never be “Freshly Pressed”. In the hopes of keeping unsuspecting eyes from stumbling across my descriptive accounts, I had WordPress mark my blog as mature. It just seemed like the mature thing to do. But now… when I browse topics and know my creative noodlings will never be listed, I get a little sad. But a lady keeps her chin up. Especially when she’s on her knees… Oh darn. There I go again.
Finally, keep your legs crossed. Not only will you appear more lady like, but there’s a certain magical way you can cross them that helps with the umm—what’s the word a lady would use?—pressure thing that can happen. And that’s all I have to say on that.