I Emailed the Reason I Started Blogging Back

The Australian’s email has been sitting in my inbox for almost a week. The unexpected contact threw me into a bit of tailspin, but not in a bad way. The rush was amazing. But I didn’t respond. I waited. Day after day passed. When thoughts of him disregarding his own set boundaries and reaching out crossed my mind I felt all warm and fuzzy inside. But still I waited. Why? First I wanted to calm down so I wasn’t flooding his inbox with emotion. But mostly I just wanted to savor the moment. As long as I didn’t hit the reply button he was the one waiting for me. He’s not waiting any more. I sent my reply about fifteen minutes ago:

What a lovely surprise to hear from you! And you remembered my birthday. : )  I didn’t forget yours in July. Congratulations on your beautiful daughter. That makes me so very happy for you.  
I’m doing good… writing when I can find the time.  
I remember you oh so fondly. 
Smiles from across the sea,
Marian

He won’t write back, not for a long time anyway. And that’s all right. It’s tempting to play the “what if” game. What if he comes back to the states? What if he asks me to come see him? What if… But I refuse to do that. I will alway carry love for him, but what we had is what we had. It was beautiful and we both will cherish the memories for the rest of our lives. But the memories won’t keep me from living. I’ve too much LIFE in me for that.

38 thoughts on “I Emailed the Reason I Started Blogging Back

  1. I’m proud of you for waiting. Sometimes we women think with our hearts and other body parts before our brains can fully process what to do. Good for you Marian. I know it’s difficult. There are times when I want to scream at him, why don’t you contact me????!!!! Then I remember that my life is less complicated without him in it. Even though that’s what my heart and body wants. To be with him. Even getting a two word message from him sets my heart reeling.

  2. Wow Marian, I applaud you. How hard it must be to be kind and good in the face of the one who made such an impact. It seems you have side stepped inevitable heartache from someone who is unavailable so good for you! Oh well, I think I remember one cute possibility who is available…in your office… or so he seems at this point. Jayne

  3. Graceful, elegant, friendly, unprovocative.
    Can you come and run my expired affairs for me, please?
    I could do with that most dangerous thing in my corner: a blonde who knows.

  4. Indeed. You did the right thing by waiting. I’m surrounded by aussie men :/ Haha that’s because I live in Australia. Who know maybe you will get a reply quicker than you expected.

  5. Grace and elegance are always becoming, not to mention the inner peace they can provide. Beautifully executed.

  6. Needless to say what has been repeated by several of others in comments above. All that I will say is – the horizon is seemless. Your choice is your decision and your happiness is your call. :)

    Peace & love

  7. An unbearably difficult task, exquisitely executed. My only question would be … how well does he read between the lines?

Talk to me. Please.

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